How To Resolve Unequal Sexual Desire
Besides the health benefits of sex in marriage, sex can also enrich your marital status and improve your relationship. But, will regular sex boost marital bliss? The answer to this question depends on scientific findings as well as personal experiences.
Scientific Findings On Regular Sex
Advocates of regular sex
Advocates of the benefits of regular sex say couples often make love every day for relaxation. In other words, sex is supposed to make you feel good especially when it’s with someone you love.
Furthermore, regular sex is good for your health and good for your relationship. It’s good for respiration, muscles, and bladder control. It’s a fine antidepressant, and it can renew your energy.
The more sex you have, the more you will want it. But note that sex doesn’t have to be done like a porn star. The idea is to have good enough sex, with realistic expectations. So that once you start, you get in the mood. No anxiety, no worries, and no regrets.
Lastly, advocates of regular sex believe that daily sex helps to deepen the bond between you and your spouse. It also boosts your confidence in lovemaking which enables you to stay in lust forever.
Opponents of regular sex
On the other hand, some scientists believe that regular sex can backfire.
The reality for them is that whether or not regular sex works, most couples can’t do it. Because no couples are in that good a mood or have that kind of energy every day. As such, the daily sex model is one that will appeal to a few, with practices even fewer. But for those who have an Olympian sexual appetite, regular sex becomes a crucial way to stay sexually and emotionally connected.
Hence, for opponents of regular sex, abstinence is a good option. The reason is that a few days off sex creates anticipation and eagerness, making the heart grow fonder. Proponents of abstinence believe it’s a way to jump-start a sagging sexual relationship. So why not plan abstinence and take advantage of it? After all, anticipation is a big part of sex.
Why Sex Is Declining Among Couples
A national opinion poll reported that the average couples have sex 66 times a year. While another report noted that 15%-20% of couples have sex less than 10 times a year, and are defined as “sexless” marriages. Yet, another study published in 2019 found that about 47% of married couples have sex less than once a week.
The reasons given for lack of interest in sex include familiarity, advancing age, parenting challenges, work pressures, and household responsibilities.
Is Regular Sex Overrated?
Having more sex is linked to higher well-being. But only up to a certain point! While regular sex is linked to happiness, this euphoria disappears once couples reach a sexual frequency of once a week. After that point, more sex didn’t seem to make any difference. Coincidentally “once a week” is the average sexual frequency for people in established relationships.
Will Regular Sex Boost Marital Bliss?
Research also shows that married people who have sex weekly are no happier than those who have less of it. This is according to a study involving 30,000 people. Furthermore, if you’re happy with the number of times you have sex in your marriage, that’s the right amount of sex for you. So, pushing sex frequency to more than once a week may decrease your desire for and enjoyment of sex. This is to say that quality is as vital as quantity.
Tips To Increase Sex Frequency
Therefore, while everyday sex isn’t necessary, it remains a great bonus and an essential part of most couples’ commitment and happiness with one another.
Then again, having sex every day may be unrealistic for most couples. However, if you and your partner want to increase sex frequency, experts offer the following tips for success:
- Increase in frequency. Experts recommend that couples should start by doubling their frequency. And then double it again in six months.
- Act on your desires. Don’t waste time rethinking your desires. Because the longer the time between the urge and action, the higher the possibility of losing motivation. So, follow up your desire with action.
- Fake it till you make it. Many experts agree that even if you aren’t in the mood, once you begin, you’ll enjoy sex.
Conclusion
Finally, will regular sex boost marital bliss? There is no perfect answer to the question, though this is not to say sex doesn’t matter. After all, in several studies, people who were having sex less than once a week were less happy and satisfied. And those numbers kept going down as the sex got less regular. This finding means a healthy, positive sexual relationship with your partner is important to marital bliss.
Aside from this, sex is not a magic potion for all marital problems. For instance, daily sex will not help a marriage that has hit rock bottom. Likewise, if some sex is good, more is not going to be better, as there are many factors that build a strong marriage. Therefore, while sex is delightful and fun, it is equally important to cherish your marriage in various ways.
https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/365-nights-of-sex-can-it-strengthen-a-marriage
Photo Credit: Creative Commons
