Feel Desirable After Menopause

feel desirable after menopause

Menopause Not Over With Sex

You can feel desirable after menopause, as you did many years before. You can have great sex, too. Just in case your sex drive slows down, think of it as a traffic hold-up, not a stop sign. Therefore, here’s what you need to do to feel desirable after menopause.

How To Feel Desirable After Menopause

Low sex drive may be the No. 1 sex complaint among midlife women. Although not all women feel it, it’s perfectly ok if you do. So, you need to chill.

Factors that may be responsible for low sex drive

In order to unlock the key to feel desirable after menopause, don’t close up on sex talk. Begin with a frank doctor visit. The causes of low desire in women are not simple. In other words, one or more of these factors could be responsible:


Out of sync with him? Women are two to three times more likely than men to see desire dip with age. Actually, you can feel the effects of menopause 10 years or more before your periods end.

Hormone effects

Falling estrogen around the time of menopause pulls down desire. Hot flashes, night sweats, and vaginal dryness, poor sleep, mood swings, rob off romance. If chemotherapy or having your ovaries removed thrusts you into menopause, you may have a harder time. As a matter of fact, it can cause more intense symptoms than the slower process of natural menopause.

feel desirable after menopause

Partner problems

Marriage trouble may have put your sex drive in the slow lane. So, don’t blame it on hormones this time.

Other health problems

Depression can be a leading sex killer. In addition are anxiety, bladder control trouble, chronic illness, and drugs used to treat illnesses.

Life complications

Many women are too busy with work and home life to be desirable and wanted.

Refocus On Your Desire Triggers

It would be great if you can swallow a sex-inducement drug, like men, to increase your sex drive. But male desire centers on blood flow. In women, it’s more complicated. Find below tips that can help you feel desirable after menopause:


Thinning vaginal tissue causes painful sex and can lead to bleeding and urinary tract infections. Both can make you avoid sex. Products like KY Jelly and Astroglide add moisture.

Try hormones

Your doctor can prescribe estrogen (in a cream, ring, or tablet) to apply in your vagina. This thickens the tissue and helps make sex feel better. If you also have symptoms like hot flashes, an estrogen patch or pills can ease them and may boost desire.

Try changing drugs

Some drugs for blood pressure and depression can reduce sex drive. Ask your doctor about taking a break from a problem drug or changing to one with few sexual side effects.

Give Sex A Second Approach

You may need a mental rejuvenation. Changing slightly your approach to sex can make a huge impact on how to feel desirable after menopause:

Put your pleasure first

If you focus on yourself during sex, you can set the right tempo for yourself. For instance, one study found that older women who were least likely to take the lead about when and how to have sex had the most unhappy partners.

feel desirable after menopause

Make time for each other

Your instinct may be to avoid romance when you don’t feel in the mood. Yet date nights and mini-trips can say “this is key to me” and help reset desire.

Return to foreplay

Your clitoris takes longer to respond with age. Give ample time to cuddle, kiss, or stroke. Simply just start fooling around, without climax as the goal.

Stoke your brain

New things turn us on. Try changing places, positions, toys, and roles. The truth is that having more sex makes you want more sex.


Don’t Make It All About Your Bed

Moving issues away from the bed can affect what goes on in it. Try these tips to help you feel desirable after menopause:


Ensure your partner understands that your coldness isn’t about your feelings for him. This is because if he doesn’t, he might be lost and feel rejected. Discuss how to make sex better. Talk about what helps, what you like.

Take a good look at yourself

Perhaps you need to do a body makeover. Lose weight if you need to, or take a fitness class — steps like these can help you see the great things about your body. Feeling sexy, desirable, and wanted are rooted in feeling good.

Ask for help

Are you overwhelmed by an empty nest or feeling “old”? Are you and your partner stuck? Discussing with a counselor can throw light on how to push forward. 


Photo Credit: Creative Commons

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